Disallusioned

Things have not been going well. I got down to 133 lbs and then hit a plateau, or slump. I don't feel like even cooking the right foods. I wish I could just get a feeding tube put in and not think about it. I hate having to think and plan on what I'm going to eat, food is not even that exciting to me right now. I'm more concerned with planning and preparing foods for my kids to eat. My three year old is subsisting on a diet of popsicles, popcorn, pizza, beans and fruit. I have to beg him to take a bite out of a vegetable. My 7 month old is eating everything I give her. She starts with her cereal and fruit in the morning. A teething biscuit mid morning, some rice, veggie and chicken combination lunch, pureed. The occasional prune and apples for afternoon snack and then a veggie like sweet potatoes or peas in the evening. She loves it all. I have to remember that when she starts to refuse to eat someday. They both loved the pancakes I made yesterday. I had the Hodgson's Mill mix and added in some bananas and cottage cheese and we all had a good breakfast. That was the last good meal I remember. Last night I just ate leftovers off my little boy's plate. Whatever he didn't eat I ate bc I was too lazy to even make myself a meal. I didn't even go to yoga yesterday.

So this morning I started with a protein shake and am now having some green tea with soy milk because I have a sore throat and my allergies are taking a toll. I had prepared some chicken salad, the stay on plan chicken salad and it doesn't look appetizing at all. I have green salad ready to go and even that doesn't look appetizing. I have some leftover spaghetti in the fridge and I would normally be all over it except that's what I had for lunch yesterday.

Maybe the weather isn't helping. I have a sore throat, runny nose and headache and have been feeling tired since Monday. All I want to do is step into a steam shower or cover my nose with a hot washcloth bc it's so sore from rubbing with tissue. Geez, what a downer. It's gray and cloudy which is good bc the triple digits have not been so great either. I think I'll just eat soup until I feel better, nothing sounds remotely appetizing. I used to be so much more creative in the kitchen. I think I'm just in a cuisine slump. Time to consult a recipe blog.

Deja Vu All Over Again

It's been so long since I posted but I need my online diet therapy again and my blog is it so here goes.  I had Baby No. 2 in November and I'm just now paying attention to my diet and fitness again.  I totally didn't feel like working out throughout my pregnancy and I'm paying for it now because I have to work harder to get back where I was pre-pregnancy.  I had been at my goal weight and doing ashtanga yoga up until March of 2008.  My yoga teacher recommended not doing ashtanga for the first trimester and then doing modified ashtanga for the second and third trimesters, but after the first tri, I just didn't wanna try anymore.  I ate normal but the lack of exercise really did me in post pregnancy.  For one I didn't lose as much weight this time around post pregnancy.  With my son I shed pounds so fast, mostly due to the breast feeding.  I remember I couldn't keep up my caloric intake fast enough.  But with my daughter, even with the breast feeding, I did not shed pounds other than those that come off with a delivery.  I thought I should start paying closer attention to my diet and get back into a regular fitness routine before the six month mark bc at the six month mark my breast milk will go down to 50% the fat content and it will be that much harder to lose the baby weight.  I've been wearing yoga pant all winter since nothing except my maternity jeans fit.  I finally got into a pair of my fat jeans which I used in my 140 lb days and kept around to use in my last two pregnancies.  They always fit me through the second trimester but they literally fall off my hips when I'm at my goal weight.  

So today I'm starting at 136.6 lbs.  That's what my morning scale smiled back at me.  I started the day with a muscle milk lite shake and then had a rice and shrimp salad for lunch and made spaghetti and turkey meat sauce for dinner.  I need to get more raw greens in tomorrow.  Writing it down really makes a difference when you see what you ate in black and white.  Yesterday I went back to ashtanga, a beginners' class, and it kicked my butt.  I woke up with sore hamstrings and deltoids.  Plus, I was out of breath after three sun salutations so I've got a lot of cardio training ahead of me.  

I plan to follow my own meal plan and fitness program at least until the six month mark and if I am not happy with my progress at that point I will get professional diet help.  I had seen a nutritionist last year to help me follow a meal plan so I need to dig out those sheets again to see which plan to follow.  I had a pregnancy plan which allowed 1850 calories a day, and then a gradual scale to 1650 cal/day, a 1450 cal/day and then a 1350 cal/day.  I actually went up the scale reverse so that I could gradually increase my caloric intake during my pregnancy.  This time I'll be working my way down.  My nutritionist advised me not to go below 1350 cal/day bc at my activity level if I did so I'd not only feel weak all the time but I would lose weight at a very slow rate bc my body would go into starvation mode.  This was a new lesson for me, I thought I had to feel weak and starving to be in weight loss mode, but she was right, the 1150 and 1250 marks made me feel like I couldn't exercise without fainting and I felt miserable for a lot longer.  Since I'm still nursing now I can't cut the calories down too much so I'm going to start at 1850 for the first week and then go down to 1650 the second week but I will do a check at that point to make sure I'm still getting everything I need and go down to 1550.  Any lower than that with exercise might do me some harm.  I will probably need to check in with my nutritionist again to double check my caloric intake against my activity level.  I'm taking the baby to post natal yoga this week to recover, then take two more ashtanga classes this week.  When I get my ashtanga endurance back I'll start running again with the stroller.  I'm too scared to even try to jog right now.  I'll get too easily discouraged with running if I can't do a mile my first time out so I'll go yoga first then running.  

I think the best I can do tomorrow is try to have a salad somewhere in the day and then protein and veggies for dinner.  It's back to meal planning I guess.  After delivery I did not even feel like cooking and it's only now that I even feel like at least cooking dinner again.  My son has been eating rice and beans, frozen pizza and waffles and fruit.  I can't get him to eat many veggies but I've been in the same boat.  I eat spoonfuls of peanut butter because even when I try to cook my baby daughter will wake up.  She's good in her swing for a little while but then she wants out, just long enough for me to open a can of tuna fish.  What I wouldn't give for a personal chef....

Diet Deja Vu

So it's been years since I last really dieted and I'm getting ready to start dieting again. I'm in my last stretch of nursing and will be weaned from by September if all goes well. I successfully kept the weight off until January of 2005 when I found out I was pregnant with my son. I got up to 155 lbs at delivery, very uncomfortable. Delivered in September of 2005 and then started nursing my son right away. I have to say, breastfeeding is the best form or weightloss I've ever experienced. First of all, I had a C-section, I labored for about twelve hours with no progression and ended up with a nice battle scar. So I felt bloated from the 12 hour IV drip right off the bat. It took two weeks for my hands, feet and legs to look totally normal again but when they did I weighed myself and was at 139 lbs. So I had 15 lbs to go but no diet to do. I tried not to think about it and just get used to my new life and concentrated on making sure my son stayed happy and healthy. He did, it was like all my extra pounds went straight to him. So because I was nursing, and my son has a healthy appetite, I was expelling about 500 calories a day. I felt hungry all the time. I was so busy, changing, nursing, holding, cuddling, and trying to do housework, errands, my job (which I transferred to my house) that I didn't get to eat my three meals, two snacks as regularly as I would have liked, and I needed that food. So I became a nibbler. I found myself eating the strangest things. They had to be foods I could cook and eat with one hand because I was usually holding my son with the other. Pop tarts, crackers, dry toast, dry bagels. Thanks to naps I could make a sandwich or soup. On awesome days I could cook a real hot meal. What I realized very quickly was that even if I had sweets, I didn't make up for the calorie deficit. By February 2006 I had gotten back to my 125 lbs and I hadn't even tried. In fact, I had to make a conscious effort to eat like when I was on LA weightloss. At the baby's six month birthday I had gotten so spoiled eating anything I wanted I started gaining weight. What happens is the breastmilk is very fattening and rich the first six months when the baby really needs it and then at six months the milk suddenly turns from whole milk to 2%. That's what it felt like. The weight gain of the baby slows down and my weight gain began. So I have been battling a sugar addiction since then. I'm up to 135 lbs again, post baby weight and need to lose 15 lbs. How sad is that. Also, I want to do it by September because I want to get pregnant again and don't want to start with those 15 lbs on my saddlebag. I think now is a good time to start dieting. My son is having three meals a day with two snacks and doesn't need to be breastfed as often. Also, if I start now with a sensible diet I think that will be enough. So I'm going to modify my LA Weightloss plan. I will do three meals and two snacks, easy to eat with my son, but with larger portions. I remember I liked the LA Lites shakes in the morning so I've bought some Myoplex Lite powdered shakes. I'll drink those in the AM with some frozen fruit for a smoothie. The tough part will be preparing the main meal foods. I have to admit it's tough because I've been preoccupied with preparing my son's food and keeping his meals on schedule. Adding mine to the mix will keep me in the kitchen more than I'd like. I've decided to prepare foods ahead of time and devise a menu that will allow us to eat the same foods. Except that the baby's food will need to be put through the blender. He hates jar food so I've had to copy the names of the jar foods and make my own versions. Turkey and vegatables, chicken noodle, chicken and pears, squash, pears. That's what I'll be eating with a salad. Wish me luck. I need to find my LA weightloss quick card now to see what foods are allowed on my plan. I know I will not be eating bananas. That was never allowed until very late in the maintenance plan. I even got used to not eating them so it was a very long time before I ate bananas again. No tomatoes either.

I put on my bathing suit to take the baby to swim lessons and decided my pouch is just too much so I will need to start jogging again. I haven't done that is a loooonggg time. I went on my first run with the jogger and realized how much more effort it is to push an extra 20lbs with you. I had to do a run-walk with more walk than run. But the baby does not cry at all in the jogger so there is no excuse not to get some exercise.

I got so much email from the blog. Lots of individuals wondering if they should do LA Weightloss. I would do it if I could. One, I can't afford it on my reduced income. Not as many work hours equals not as many dollars in the bank. Two, I can't follow it strictly for now because I'm still nursing and I'm not even sure if they have a nursing plan. I know WeightWatchers has modifications to their plan for nursing moms. Three, time restrictions, can't make the three consultations a week. So I'm going to wing it alone and see what happens. I will not be using supplements right now for the same reasons. I'm currently taking prenatal vitamins, birth control pills and a calcium supplement and that is enough to give me an upset stomach I it's empty. I will be writing down all my food intake. Food diaries are great because you are accountable, at least to yourself. I'm amazed at how many beverages I take for granted because I'm not writing them down. Those extra calories can really add up. Also, I need to start measuring out my water intake. I was drinking 64 oz a day on LA Weightloss. Sometimes that would really make me sick on so little food so I'll drink as much as I can and stop when I feel gross.

Here goes nothing...

Nu Lites Inquiry

Today I went to my third consult of the week and weighed in at 121.8 lbs. I'm slowly getting closer to my goal. I met with Mary and she reviewed my diary. In the consult offices are displayed all the LA Weight Loss products on a back table. As soon as I sat down I reached for a few boxes on display to browse the ingredients. Mary asked me if I had any questions or concerns. I said "yes, actually". I then let Mary know about my recent comparisons regarding the lites and asked what LA Weight Loss' stand was regarding trans fats. I let Mary know I had been recently scrutinizing the ingredients in each of the lites I had been consuming. Mary admitted she has had several clients inquire about the same thing. She asked first of all if the lites had been working for me as far as satisfying cravings. She emphasized the lites had been very successful in satisfying chocolate cravings for clients and that was one of the objectives of the lites. I let Mary know I wasn't so concerned about satisfying cravings and consumed the lites primarily because they are part of the program and was committed to following the program step by step regardless of the cravings. Truth is, I've had cravings throughout the program and not just for chocolate. I've had cravings for chips and salsa, quesedillas, pizza, etc. and that none of the lites worked to satisfy those cravings. I have accepted that I'm on a restrictive diet and will not be able to satisfy all of my cravings. For this reason I'm willing to compromise the lites with alternative nutritionally sound products. Mary said she understood and that she could inquire with the nutritionist about the effects of the trans fats on the program. I asked Mary if any of the lites were free of the trans fats. She could not tell me off the top of her head so I went through all the boxes on display. We found the only lites free of the trans fats were the cold serve powder shakes in chocolate, vanilla and strawberry and all the cold serve fruit drink mixes. I took boxes of the cold serve shakes in each flavor with me and thanked Mary for offering to contact the nutritionist. It was nice of her to offer, but honestly I don't think I need to wait for a nutritionist to confirm effects of trans fats on the program. Most of the recent information presented in online news, health magazines, health articles and TV news segments has confirmed trans fats are not beneficial to the body and not part of a heart healthy diet. I figured the LA Weight Loss nutritionist would either respond with a contrary take on the effects of trans fats which I would not believe or confirm that the trans fats are in their products but in small amounts not detrimental to an individual on the program. I would also disagree with this kind of a response. I told Mary I had purchased lites in bulk and did not want to continue consuming the bars or products containing the hydrogenated oils but that I could continue with the cold serve drinks and shakes to get all the products I had paid for. I figure if I want a bar I will buy an alternative product at the grocery or health food store. I will read the label carefully to be sure no trans fats exist in any of the products I'm consuming. I let Mary know I understood individuals will occasionally consume trans fats in daily life but that if I ate two bars a day and was in the weight loss phase for more than three months that was daily intake of trans fats and I did think that was excessive. Also, that much time has passed and I have several more months to go consuming the products, that was enough damage. Maybe I'm being paranoid or compulsive about the trans fats but I'd rather be safe than sorry with regard to the issue. Now on to reverse any damage I may have done to my heart.

Alternatives to Bars, Shakes and Supplements

LA Weight Loss offers their Nu Lite products and Slimdown meal replacement shakes and I have bought them and do like their product. However, you could go broke buying all their products. Also, if you are on the plan more than 3 months you may get bored with the flavors as I have. The last time I went for my consult and weigh in, 122.4 lbs., Stephanie told me they would be discontinuing the bulk rates on products. For example, cereal bars had been $25 for five boxes and slimdown shakes had been 4 four packs for $44.00. That was expensive enough. Now LA Weight Loss will only sell boxes and shakes at their full original prices no matter how many you buy. That brings the slimdown shakes to $15.00 for 1 four pack. Stephanie then offered me a one day special of all supplements, a few boxes of cereal bars and a few packs of slimdown shakes for $169.00. I really wasn't ready to shell out any money that day so I thanked Stephanie and declined the offer. I decided to look for alternative products on my own available at local market and health food stores. I figured supplements, vitamins and nutrition bars and shakes are just made up of the same chemical compounds with variations of course. Also, LA Weight Loss didn't exactly develop their products from original formulas. So, I laid out in a spreadsheet the breakdown of all the lites, shakes and supplments and took my list online and to the market to find alternatives. Here is what I came up with.

Replacements for Nu Lite Bars and Shakes
-GeniSoy Soy Protein Shake (canned powder)
-GeniSoy Soy Protein Ultra XT Shake (canned powder)
-GeniSoy Xtreme Bar
-GeniSoy Xtreme Crunch Bar
-Myoplex Lite Nutrition Bar
-AdvantEdge Carb Control Nutrition Bar
-AdvantEdge Nutrition Bar
-Luna Bars
-Atkins Ready to Drink Shakes

Replacements for SlimDown shakes
-EAS AdvantEdge Ready to Drink (high sugars like slimdown)
-Myoplex Lite Ready to Drink (less sugars than slimdown)
-Myoplex Carb Sense Ready to Drink (less carbs)
-Myplex Carb Sense Nutrition Bar
-AdvantEdge Nutrition Crisp Bar
-AdvantEdge Nutrition Layered Bar
-Atkins Advantage Bar
-Atkins Ready to Drink Shakes
-GeniSoy Bars

I also looked up alternatives to the vitamin and mineral supplements and here is the list I made.

-FB 500 is similar Natrol's brand of Chitosan ($19.09), and has more milligrams of Chitosan
-Tri Max is similar to the Atkins Dieter's Advantage or Nature's Plus CitriMax ($18.49) or Natrol's CitriMax Plus ($17.21)
-Celluway is similar to the Atkin's brand of Accel ($14.99)
-Vita Max is similar to the Atkin's brand of Basic 3 ($19.39)
-Calcium Chewable is similar to most calcium supplements, I take Nature's Plus Cal/Mag supplement
-LA's EFA is similar to the Atkin's brand Essential Oils supplement ($15.99)

I packed my lunch on Wednesday and forgot to pack my two LA lite bars. Luckily I had just made my list and made a copy to keep in my car for grocery shopping. I work across the street from Whole Foods so I walked over to buy two Luna Bars. I had my consult the same day and jotted down "Luna Bar" in my diary. I met with Mary and she viewed my diary and commented on my Luna Bar. I told her about forgetting my lites and she said she didn't like Luna Bars but another counselor at the center who was on the program used Luna Bars for lites. Mary had her own diary in the chest pocket of her scrubs and told me she was also on the program. She commented that she really liked ProMax bars for her lites. I asked her where to buy them but she didn't really know. She said they were the closest in taste and nutrition to the lites and said her favorite was the blueberry cheesecake. I thanked her for the info and decided to look for the bar on my next grocery outing. If I find the nutritional content is similar I'll add it to the list.

What I found after breaking down the lites, shakes, etc. is that each product has a basic build of calories, fat, carbs and protein. If I find a product that has close to the same nutrients I'll add it to my list. Products with higher carbs and protein fit into meal replacements (1 protein, 1 starch on plan) and those products that have higher carbs and less protein fit into the lite category.
Here is the breakdown of the Nu Lites.
-180 calories (40 from fat)
-3.5-4.5g total fat (2-3g saturated fat)
-23-30g carbs
-less that 1 to 1g fiber
-16-21g sugars
-8g protein (consistent on all lites)
-additional cholesterol, sodium and potassium content

The bars contain the most carbs and sugars. The drinks like creamy hot cocoa and cafe au lait have considerably less sugars and carbs which leads me to believe that you can have lite substitutes with less carbs and sugars. Some of the products on my list do have less carbs and sugars. Check labels always to get what you want. Also, after careful scrutiny of the LA Lite labels I found not all the ingredients listed are the most nutritious. For example, the fruit oat bars and honey nougat bars with the white frosting contain sugar and partially hydrogenated palm kernal oil, a trans fat.

The breakdown of a slimdown shake is as follows:
-250-270 calories (45 from fat)
-5g total fat (3g saturated fat)
-36g carbs
-less than 1 to 2g fiber
-32g sugars
-20g protein
-additional cholesterol, sodium and potassium content

I didn't find any trans fats in the shakes but maybe I just didn't recognize all ingredients. However, the sugar content is pretty high. I will definitely be buying the alternatives with less sugar.

What I learned from my little quest is not to blindly follow the food choices and supplements offered by LA Weight Loss. True, they know how to help you lose weight but they are a business and make money off these products too. With tons of other good alternative products on the market at this time it's a good idea to keep the competitive market alive and kicking.

Steady Progress

I went in for my Friday consult yesterday and weighed in at 123 lbs. I am still losing and haven't hit a plateau, knock on wood. I met with Misty and she reviewed my chart. She noticed no one had taken measurements since I first started the program at the end of June. So she offered to take my measurements. My waist went from a 34" to a 28"! I was glad about that. My chest went from a 36" to a 34". I was sad about that. I tend to lose breast volume with any weight loss though so I knew that would happen. My hip measurement went from 38" to 36" and my upper thigh measurement went from 21" to 20". A total of 11", almost a foot! I knew I was losing inches because my clothes were loose, but to actually record the measurements made it sink in. I was very encouraged. It was like a boost and helped me see the last 8 lbs to lose as something to actually look forward to. I don't feel deprived of food at all, at least not today. I mean I know I am on a restrictive diet but I don't feel cheated from the restrictions because I feel like my reward is a few less ounces, which eventually lead to one less pound. Of course that's how I feel today. I might want a taco tomorrow. Seeing the weight come down a few ounces a day is torture enough. If they had taken measurements throughout I may have become more discouraged. My average weight loss has come to 1.6 lbs a week. I'm sure inches take much longer to add up.

At the center they have a board posting the names of the top losers, as in weight losers. So you want to be a loser. The names are posted with average weightlosses of the individuals. I was looking at it yesterday because it is next to the scale and I was waiting while they pulled my file. The top losers had averaged up to 5 lbs. a week. I can't imagine. Just to keep a 1.6 lb average going I not only stick to the plan but exercise several times a week to help with the weight loss. It just goes to show that everyone is different. Some are blessed with fast metabolisms others have skinny fat cells, and the rest like me have to take FB 500. Oh well.

I've decided I'm not going to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe. Because I can't afford a whole new wardrobe. I actually still fit in all my old stuff. Well, I now fit into my old stuff is how I should put it. My tops fit better but I'm not swimming in them. My bottoms fit better too. There are two skirts that have a really loose waistband but I like it. I'm keeping those. I probably will buy a couple of new things in a smaller size just as a reward. But I'm not going on a shopping spree, I'm still paying the weightloss center.

Not blown completely

I had a ball at my cousin's wedding. Actually, it took place over Labor Day weekend. I really had a ball all weekend. I went to San Antonio with the best of intentions and took time to carefully pack my supplements, slimdown shakes, lite bars and fruits. I should have known better. I will have to stay out of San Antonio and limit my family visits during the weight loss phase. Even during stabilization and maintenance I will probably have to come back to Austin and repeat a stricter phase of the program a week after I return. I went to San Antonio weighing 125 lbs and came back weighing 128 lbs. I followed Saturday fine, not too many indulgences. Some Barcardi and diet coke, a frozen margarita, a couple of pieces of wedding cake. But on Sunday morning I ate two huge breakfast tacos from Rita's Tacos. Rita's has the best tacos and still makes them with handmade flour tortillas. Hard to resist. I had a healthy dinner with asparagus and tomato salad and sirloin steak. But I also ate roasted potatoes and ciabiatta bread. Then Monday I went to my brother in law's Labor Day picnic. I had three sangrias, chips and salsa, fajita tacos, pasta salad and cake and ice cream. The portions were small but that is a wide pastiche of food over a short period of time. If I had brought the whole bottle of FB 500 with me I would have had to get my stomach pumped.

I weighed myself Tuesday morning back home in Austin and got nervous. 128 lbs the scale read. I slapped myself back into the Green Plan and did not deviate the entire week. Wednesday I was back at my counseling session. Thank goodness I met with Stephanie. I spilled my guts and told her the whole story. She was very amused over my sangria binge. By Wednesday I was weighing 126 lbs again. I let Stephanie know there were no more family events scheduled for a few more months and that I would not do a full weekend binge for a long time. I was realistic though and discussed the fact that I will probably just indulge every now and then. After all, I don't want to eliminate special occasions all together and I am the one to experience any effects from my actions. Stephanie agreed and laughed because usually clients do not actually write down their indulgences in the diary. I thought that was strange that anyone feels they need to hide their activities from the counselors. I've decided to tell them everything. Afterall, I am paying for the service. It's my nickel if I want to stall weight loss.

By Friday I was back to the previous week's weight of 125 lbs. It took a week to recover from an indulgent weekend. That really made me feel better. I decided that indulgences do occur and can occur without it being a disaster. There are outcomes from indulgences. I resist using the word consequences because I view it as simple as cause and effect. If I indulge in a drink or dessert I will gain weight unless I exercised enough to burn the same amount of calories. But if I do I will just go back to a weight loss phase until I lose the weight and go back to normal. I can deal with that kind of yo yo. I just hope to never play the 20 lb yo yo game again.

Today, I weighed in at 124 lbs. I'm getting close. I remember when I went from 130 lbs to 129 lbs. Just being in the twenties was so encouraging. The digits made a difference in my mind. As I get closer I am finding it easier to stick to the program. I admit I did have a yummy enchilada dinner with my husband at Chuy's this weekend. But I exercised the following day and all this week and have been sticking to my program since. It almost seems like there were no effects from that enchilada dinner when I weighed in today. Some credit must also go to FB 500 too. Nine pounds to go.